I stole this from a friends blog but thought that it was hilarious!  I guess we all live and learn.  Enjoy!
Maternity Clothes:
1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.   
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible. 
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes. 
_____________________________________________________ 
Preparing for the Birth: 
1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously. 
2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last 
time, breathing didn't do a thing. 
3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your eighth month. 
__________________________________________ ____________ 
The Layette: 
1st baby: You pre-wash newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau. 
2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and 
discard only the ones with the darkest stains. 
3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they? 
______________________________________________________ 
Worries: 
1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper, 
a frown--you pick up the baby 
2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten 
to wake your firstborn. 
3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to 
rewind the mechanical swing. 
______________________________________________________ 
Pacifier: 
1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until 
you can go home and wash and boil it. 
2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it 
off with some juice from the baby's bottle. 
3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in. 
______________________________________________________ 
Diapering: 
1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour, 
whether they need it or not. 
2nd baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed. 
3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to 
complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees. 
_______________________________________________________ 
Activities: 
1st baby:  You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, 
Baby Zoo, Baby Movies and Baby Story Hour. 
2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics. 
3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaners. 
_____________________________ _________________________ 
Going Out: 
1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, 
you call home five times. 
2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to 
leave a number where you can be reached. 
3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood. 
______________________________________________________ 
At Home:  
1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby. 
2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby. 
3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children 
______________________________________________________ 
Swallowing Coins (a favorite): 
1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays 
2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the coin to pass. 
3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!
 
10 comments:
haha, I don't even want to know what happens with the 4TH CHILD!
Ha ha! Thanks for the laugh, that was hilarious!!!
Classic!
haha that was great! Thanks..
Fantastic stuff
I am proud to say I am more like the person with a second child! Yea for me!
Funny! Maybe someday I'll have a second and test this theory out!
:) We always joke that you can tell how many kids a mom has by the size of her diaper bag! (1st child, you bring everything...4th child, you stuff a diaper/wipes in your purse & call it good)
Thanks for the smile!
I can't believe how badly I fit the profile! In fact, I had Annie babysit for me last night and told her to call HER mom if she had any problems! :)
Oh, and my mother-in-law constantly gives me grief about not changing diapers as often as I should, and I just tell her I have to get my quarters worth! :) Thanks for the laugh!
Post a Comment